Networking Strategy Review
Standard advice on re-engaging a dormant professional network often suggests reaching out to old contacts to "catch up," "meet for coffee," or "touch base" when you haven't spoken in a while. This seems polite, but it actually puts a burden on them. These vague requests make the other person do the hard work of figuring out why you are suddenly contacting them after months or years of silence.
When you send these random messages, you look like someone only showing up when they might need something. The other person instantly senses this feeling of just wanting something, which is why your messages often get ignored. This creates a difficult cycle: you feel too awkward to follow up, and they feel too busy to answer a request that has no clear reason. As a result, you let important relationships fade just to avoid the discomfort of seeming needy.
To stop this pattern, you must stop asking people for their time and start offering useful things right away. You need a clear plan to remove the unnecessary talk and make sure every contact gives immediate value. A clear review of your outreach approach lets you stop asking for favors and shift the focus to making "deposits." This means sending a short message with no strings attached that shares a specific useful link, a piece of industry news, or a helpful introduction that directly helps their current work.
What Is a Dormant Professional Network?
A dormant professional network is the set of former colleagues, mentors, and contacts you once had genuine relationships with but haven't spoken to in six months or more. These connections often hold more career value than your currently active contacts, because during the gap they have built entirely new knowledge bases and professional circles that your current network can't access.
A landmark study by Daniel Z. Levin, Jorge Walter, and J. Keith Murnighan, published in Organization Science (2011), found that executives who consulted dormant contacts received more valuable problem-solving assistance, novel information, and referrals than when they reached out to their currently active contacts. The study called this the "dormant tie advantage"—the very gap in communication creates a gap in perspective that makes advice from these contacts uniquely useful when you finally reconnect. If you are also navigating a career change, the same principle applies: your dormant network may hold the most relevant introductions you haven't thought to ask for yet. Read our guide on how to network your way into a career change for more on this.
Main Points to Remember
-
01
Change Your Mindset Switch from trying to get favors to being genuinely interested in others. Stop treating your contacts like people you only call when you need a job. Instead, focus on reconnecting because you are truly interested in what they are working on now.
-
02
Change How You Act Stop asking for formal "catch-up" meetings and start sending small, easy interactions. Avoid long, awkward emails asking to "pick someone's brain" after years of silence. Focus on sending quick, specific notes or sharing articles that give value without needing a lot of their time.
-
03
Change When You Reach Out Don't guess when to contact people; use clear signs as reasons to connect. Don't rely on your memory to decide when to follow up. Use career news, company updates, or social media posts as natural moments to restart conversations when you are most relevant to them.
Networking Check: What to Avoid and How to Fix It
Check #1: Sending Vague Messages
You send general messages asking to "catch up," "meet for coffee," or "have a quick call" with people you haven't talked to in months or years.
You are asking for a favor before offering any value. By asking for someone's time without a clear reason, you make them do the extra work of figuring out why you're contacting them, which usually results in your message being ignored.
Share a Specific Helpful Item
Instead of asking for a meeting, send a link to an industry article or a helpful tool that deals with a problem they are currently facing. Say exactly why you thought of them and make it clear that they don't need to reply or meet up right away.
Check #2: The Needy Ghost Trap
You only remember to contact your network when you are unhappy at your current job or actively looking for a new role.
People can usually tell when you are reaching out because you are desperate rather than genuinely interested. If the only time they hear from you is when you need a favor, they start to see you as someone who uses them, creating a feeling of guilt that stops you from staying in touch when things are going well.
Make Unexpected Deposits
Set aside time every month for a recurring "no reason" check-in with three people. Share a compliment about a recent success they had or a piece of news about their company to keep the relationship alive when you don't need anything from them.
Check #3: Taxing Their Attention
You write very long emails explaining everything you’ve done in the last two years and ask several open-ended questions about their life.
Busy, important people are overwhelmed by their current tasks and see long, messy messages as a drain on their limited time. Even if they like you, they will likely wait to reply because it feels like too much effort to write a full answer.
The Three-Sentence Limit
Keep your first message to three sentences: one to connect personally, one to share something helpful, and one to close without asking for much back. This lets the recipient read and understand your message in seconds without feeling like they have to write a long response.
The Connection Building Plan
Choosing Who to Contact (Days 1 to 3)
The goal here is to stop waiting and start organizing. You can't contact everyone at once, so you must decide who is most important.
- Pick 15 Names: Write down 15 names of former coworkers, mentors, or people in your field you haven't spoken to in over six months.
- Quick Check: Spend 5 minutes on each person's LinkedIn or social media. Note one recent good thing they did (a new job, a promotion, or an article they shared).
- Group Them: Put them into three groups of five. You will contact one group each week so the work isn't too much.
- Note Seniority: If several of your contacts are significantly more senior than you, adjust your approach for those conversations. Our guide on how to network with people more senior than you covers the specific adjustments that matter.
Starting the Conversation Gently (Week 1)
In this step, you break the silence. The rule is: Do not ask for a favor. You are just letting them know you are thinking about them.
-
Send the "No-Pressure" Message: Use a simple template for your first group of five.
Example: "Hi [Name], I saw your post about [Topic] and it made me think of our time working on [Project]. Hope everything is going well!"
- Keep it Short: Your message should be no more than three sentences.
- How to End It: Do not end with a question that needs a long answer. Close with something like, "No need to write back, just wanted to say hello!" This removes the feeling that they have homework.
Exchanging Value (Week 2)
Now that you’ve broken the silence, you want to show you are a helpful part of their network, not just someone looking for a job.
-
Share Something Useful: After they reply to your first message, follow up a few days later by sending something that is helpful.
Example: "I found this article on [Topic we talked about] and immediately thought of you."
- Give Public Support: Like or comment on a recent post they shared. A smart comment ("Good point about the future of X!") is more meaningful than a simple "Like."
- Offer to Connect People: If you know someone they should meet, offer to make an introduction. "I’m talking to someone in [Industry] next week—would you like me to mention your work to them?"
Keeping It Going (Week 3 and Onward)
Networking is a long-term activity, not a quick fix. This step makes sure your network never goes cold, so you don't have to restart it later.
- The Quick Chat: Ask 1 to 2 people from your list for a short, 15-minute video call or coffee to "talk about trends in the industry."
- Set a Monthly Reminder: Pick one day each month (like the first Friday) to reach out to three people on your list just to check in.
- Update Your Log: Keep a simple note on your phone of when you last spoke to your key contacts. If it has been more than 90 days, put them back into Step 2.
How Cruit Helps You Reconnect Faster
For Planning
Career Guidance ToolWorks like a guide to help you decide on your outreach goal through thought-provoking questions.
For Sharing Value
Journaling ToolKeep track of your achievements and use AI to break down the details, automatically finding things to share authentically.
For Doing It
Networking ToolOrganize your contacts and use the AI Assistant to write short, personalized messages that don't ask for too much.
Common Questions
What if I don't have any big news or resources to share?
Value doesn't have to be a huge discovery. It can be as simple as a podcast episode you liked, a helpful online tool you found, or even a link to a book that reminded you of a past conversation. The main point is to show you are thinking about their interests, not to teach them something major.
What if I'm reaching out to someone more senior who already knows everything?
Even experts like to stay updated. You can offer value by sharing what people on the front lines are seeing that they might miss, or by simply pointing out a recent success of theirs that you admired. Showing that you pay attention to their work is valuable on its own.
What if it has been many years since we last spoke?
How long it has been doesn't matter as much as how good your first message is. You don't need to make a big excuse for not keeping in touch. Briefly mention the time gap, and then quickly move to the helpful resource you have for them. A "value-first" message is the best way to reconnect without it feeling awkward.
How often should I reach out to people in my dormant network?
Once every 60 to 90 days is a reasonable cadence for most contacts. Anything more frequent can feel like pressure; anything less and the relationship goes cold again. The key is to anchor your outreach to real events: a promotion they announced, an article they published, or news about their company. This way, reaching out always feels earned rather than forced.
What should I do if my first message goes unanswered?
Wait two to three weeks, then send one follow-up that adds new value rather than repeating your original message. Something like: "I came across this and thought of you—no reply needed." If that also goes unanswered, move on without any hard feelings. People get busy, inboxes overflow, and silence rarely means rejection. Keep them on your list and try again in a few months with a different piece of value.
Focus on what matters.
You no longer have to feel like a secret caller, showing up only when you need something. Shifting your focus from "taking" time to "giving" value stops the awkward silences and builds a reputation as someone who is helpful. This method takes the pressure off everyone and turns old contacts into real supporters. Start your review today by looking at your old contacts and finding three people who could use a quick, helpful tip. You can change your unused network into your best professional tool.
{CTA to sign up}
